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IWDM Study Library 
Concern Facing Muslim Women

Sister Amatullah:
We have been told that Imam Mohammed is in the house, so to speak. Imam Mohammed is here with us, excuse me for that. We get a little excited and we don't really need an introduction and I don't want to disrespect him to hold back his time, but he's here. We'd like to bring him before us to discuss with us The Concerns Facing Muslim Women. I introduce to you Imam WD Mohammed.
IWDM:
Praise be to Allah, the Lord Sustainer of the Worlds. We witness that there is no G-d, no divine but Allah and we witness that Muhammad, to whom the Qur'an was revealed is our His servant and Messenger. We pray the Prayers and the Peace be on him and what follows of that traditional salute to the last Servant, Messenger of G-d, Prophet of G-d. Dear sisters, let me first say that I just come off the road and we were doing our best to arrive here at two o'clock, but that was very, very much difficult for us. Almost impossible. We attended the conference in Kansas City of the Islamic Society of North America last night and had a wonderful and brotherly union with them in the program and were there late and we hadn't eaten until by the time we left there and got dinner and retired. It was very late. So, we got very little sleep and we hit the road early this morning and flew here, flew, pardon me, flew to midway by Southwest Airline, midway Chicago, midway Airport, Chicago, and from there we drove here. We met the other cars and drove here. So, I'm just off the road and I would like to be in the house, Praise be to Allah. But believe me, I'll do as G-d tells us to do, I'll come in by proper doors.
Yes. First let me thank you Sister Amatullah and the Sisters Association. Let me thank you for the honor of addressing you here today. We do have some concerns, very serious concerns for improving the treatment of females. Allah Most High as you know, you who study the Qur'an and follow the teachings of Islam, keep up with the message of Islam as it's being propagated in America, our news media, newspaper and the news media that we have by way of cable television and whatever you who study Qur'an or read Qur'an and keep up with what is going on for Muslims in America, I'm sure you are aware of what I'm bringing, concern I'm bringing to you and you are aware of what we are doing, trying to do to bring about the situation that Allah wants for us based upon what He revealed to Muhammad in the Qur'an and what Prophet Muhammad, Prayers and Peace be Upon him, established for us as an example for us to follow. Our concern is mainly of two, I would say in two areas, the international area.
That is the international Ummah. We know that in the international Ummah, most of our men are not giving the treatment to the females that Allah and His Messenger has ordered. We know that, and I have to admit that in America we are in a very, I would say, serious situation because many of us are newly converted to Islam and many of our men are not authorities on what G-d has revealed and what the Prophet himself established regarding the treatment of females or proper regard for women. We know that most of our men are not informed. And what complicates that is that the international world of Islam is itself not yet where it should be.
Again, regarding the proper respect for females, the proper respect for women. We can misinterpert so many things very easily and we can make judgments without knowledge very easily. Before going further, let me say to you that whatever Allah has revealed in the Qur'an, if we are Muslims, we have to accept that whatever Allah has established through His Messenger Muhammad, we have to accept that. There's no question, there's no way for us to question that. We have to accept that, but there's a lot of ignorance. Many of us don't know the whole picture. We can take something, a little part and move on that and not know the other part that balance that or give balance to that or give fuller meaning to that you see. And it is very important to know the Qur'an in its context, in its context. For example, to know what a Muslim is, you don't go to any other source book to know what a Muslim is.
We go to the Qur'an. That's where the best definition comes. The first and the best definition comes to us of what a Muslim is. Likewise for the treatment of women, if we want to know the treatment of women, we don't go to what this writer said or that writer said or this Imam said or that Imam said first. No, we have to go to the Qur'an first. And unless those writers, those Imams, those Scholars, those authorities respect first what Allah has revealed in the Qur'an and what is established in the life of the Prophet, then we are on weak footing if we are influenced or accept what they're saying. Oh, I know you want me to say right away. Can our brothers have more than one wife?
Don't ask me because I don't have permission to give them that right. Ask the Qur'an, ask Allah, ask the Qur'an, can they do that. Now let me, for the sake of clearing the air, well better than that, it's more serious than that. Let me, for the sake of turning on the lights say this. The prevailing idea and principle or rule in our religion and in our life is justice. G-d brings our attention to the need for justice and how He forces justice, forges, forces or brings about justice through the workings not only with man. If man won't obey, He brings it about through the workings of the natural world. The natural world order, the physical world order. He will bring it about. G-d says that He has not created the universe except for just purpose, just ends. Just purpose. Just purpose. So, justice is the overriding principle in every matter. Justice is the overriding principle. So, if we deny a female something that she wants, we have to first ask, is it just justice to do that?
And right away without even consulting the Qur'an or the life of the Prophet, if we know in our hearts that that's not right, that's not just, then we should at least hesitate to do that or to continue that treatment or to continue to deny that to the female until we consult the Qur'an and the life of the Prophet. And most of the time, as Allah says, in what bothers the soul and the heart of a sincere person, human being is most likely what G-d Himself wants. So, if something is bothering you, bothering you, and you're a sincere believer, you a good person and you just can't find yourself living with that or accepting that, most likely G-d is on your side, most likely G-d is on your side. Now, there are some exceptions where we are ourselves are so hurt, so deeply scarred and wounded that we can't see with normal eyes in our circumstances. That happens sometimes, but that is very rare. G-d wants justice, G-d wants justice, and it is not justice to dominate females, brothers. You're going to tell them, right? There's some powerful brothers in here now with me. And good brothers, very good brothers. And it is not right to dominate females. And at this point, let me concentrate on the international community of Muslims. In the international community of Muslims, what we have is the influence of local, national, ethnic, culture life or tradition. So, you'll find the people still imposing. For example, and I am using a country that I have great admiration for- Pakistan. The country Pakistan, you'll find the Pakistanis, they dress like the Indians who are not Muslims and you'll find some of us wanting to dress like the Pakistanis because we think that's Muslim and the Pakistani and the Hindu are dressing almost the same. They dress so similar, you can't hardly tell the difference. So that's an example of local choice, the local choice of a people, that they have followed even before the Prophet or the advent of Islam or the advent of the Prophet 1400 and so years ago, you see? They were following those traditions and we should reason like this: That if Muslims don't have the same dress, if their dress are associated with their culture, with that nation and their culture, then we should also believe that their thinking is most likely designed too by their locale and their history in that locale, even before the Prophet brought Islam, Prayers and Peace be upon him.
This is how we should reason. So, it leaves us, again, I can't emphasize this enough, with the Qur'an. That's what we have to turn to. We are not to turn to any nation or any people. Egyptians, Saudi Arabians or anybody else for the model, the model for ourselves, whether it be dress, behavior in society or whether it be relationships, how we should perceive and understand relationships. And there is no relationship more I would say vital to the life of a society than the relationship of man and woman, especially in marriage. No relationship. More important than that, G-d takes our life and our minds and our focus and our attention and interest all the way back to the beginning of the human family by saying that He created us, and the sister just has read from that chapter, that He created us from one soul.
Now this Nafsin Wahida, Nafsin Wahida. You who understand a little Arabic, Wahida is feminine. So, if G-d created us Nafsin Wahida, then it is talking about an entity that is giving a description that's feminine. And we know that we are created from Adam, the first man. But this is something, this is an idea of that first man that must not have anything to do with sex right now. Because G-d says He created him from Nafsin Wahida. We know what that Nafsin Wahida is. The scholars know, the learned Imams know. It's the soul, the common soul of the human being. We have one common soul. That's what G-d wants us to know first. That we all descended from out of and multiplied upon this earth from one common soul, the soul of man and woman the same. That's what it's saying. How come this is in the Qur'an? Because there are some religions believing that G-d put a divine soul in the males and left that out of the females.
That's how come the Qur'an comes like that to correct that thinking in the religions. Understand this too, that though Islam is not to impose itself on any people, Al- Islam comes to be a light for the world. And our Prophet Prayers and Peace be on him, he is a light for the world. Allah says he's a mercy to all people, to mankind. And we know that Allah says "And he is sufficient for all mankind, that he is sufficient for all people, for all people." So don't think that he's only our model, that he's only our example. He is the leader of Muslims, but he is a model leader for all the worlds. For all nations, for all religions, for all people. Nafsin Wahida, returning to that. Nafsin Wahida. So the adjective description here in terms of gender, addresses this first self, or first soul, as a feminine entity, as a feminine entity. That's what we have to understand. Allah says, "And He made from it it's mate and it's mate is masculine.
He made from it its mate and its mate is masculine. Sisters, please don't follow the Jewish feminine movement. Please don't follow the Jewish women feminist movement. Please don't do that. You'll miss everything I'm saying. Yes. So, He created Nafsin Wahida and then He made from it its mate and its mate is masculine, it's mate is masculine. So here we have the soul before the man, the soul is before man. Whereas the other scriptures, especially one in particular, I don't want to name because we don't want to have any conflict within any particular religion right now unless it's absolutely necessary.
The idea is that no, G-d did not make man first and he was a separate entity and a sex entity, a male sex entity. No, that did not happen. G-d created the human nature first. He created the soul, which is the human nature. It is the repository, it is the essence of every person, the essence of every person. And it is the seed, the seed for everything that is possible for male and female, the soul. Everything possible for us is possible because of that human soul. Our intelligence evolves because of that human soul. And every other aspect of our human life evolves because of that human soul. That's why G-d said He created us like a plant. As a plant. A plant comes from a seed and from that seed comes the plant that has both male and female in it. That's most plants isn't it? That's characteristic of plants. From one seed that is not male or female, but has the power, the potential, the capacity to produce both. From the one seed comes the plant. And in the plant, in the plant we find both the male and female in the single plant. And everything possible for that plant was in the seed.
If it can bear flowers, it was in the seed. If it can bear flowers and fruit, it was in the seed. If it can produce great amount of timber for us, it was in the seed. Whatever is possible for it was in the seed. So, when we look at these cities that man has designed, we see what is in the soul of every human being. But it so happened that G-d selected the woman to cherish the new life. She has to carry the life, carry the life and cherish the life and protect the life until the life is ready to join the adult or the mature society, members in the society. Because of that physiology that G-d has given the woman, the woman is held back from the broad and open field of exploration, et cetera. And G-d says that He has given the male a superiority over the female and G-d doesn't leave us to wonder what explains that superiority.
Oh, is it the superior soul, superior intellect? G-d didn't mention soul, didn't mention intellect, didn't mention moral, morality, didn't mention spirituality. G-d says it's because of your more powerful physical structure. And because you have amassed great wealth over many generations. You have been free to go out and explore the fields, cultivate the earth and become the controller of the material, material life, the material life. So, you are in control of the material life. You own the land, you own the house and everything. So, you have this superiority over the women. Now, if G-d has, I think I can come up with other advantages that I have over women as a male more than just physical and money. I don't have that. In fact, I have lost the physical advantage over some of you sisters. I don't even have the physical advantage anymore. But I can think of some other advantages. But all the advantages I think of there, they are advantages because of the society favoring the male. That's why we have those advantages. The society, the way we live and the way society is ordered, it favors the male over the female in certain ways that gives male a superiority. Even the history of male and female occupations clearly explain to us why men are physically stronger and more suited to the work field, to the work, to the work field or the job market. More suited because of this long tradition over the generations of having experience and activity and being in control of that. We do not have, according to our understanding of the Qur'an and the example that Prophet Muhammad has set, we do not have an intellectual superiority. Only because of advantage. That's the only reason we have it. Given the same circumstances, sisters can compete with us, equal us, and if circumstances favor them, they will surpass us. We have in the Islamic world cases where the intellectual female has risen above all the intellectual males and become the strongest and most dependent upon, most reliable authority for even the males.
Recently we have an Islamic history of Islamic communities, women rising up in the society to become the heads of state, the heads of state. So, if all the men belonging to a particular nation accept to have a woman over them, that should tell us that there is really no real inequality of the sexes. That's why G-d says, Allah Subhana Wa Ta Ala, highly glorified is He. He says, men, males have an advantage over females and females have an advantage over males. Men have rights over women, women have rights over men. And Allah Most High says, I'm speaking to the international, addressing the international community situation now. Allah says that He does, Allah does. G-d does not disregard or discount the work of any worker, whether male or female, whether male or female. Now let us understand what that means. I am a welder by trade and a lot of other things by trade. I'm a welder by trade and I work on a job doing a certain thing. Say I'm welding tanks for acid, to hold acid, the wells have to be such that even acid can't come through a crack. And a female comes there, and she can do the same thing. She can satisfy the boss, the company just like I can. By that saying in the Qur'an, it would be unfair to the female to give her less money than I make.
And this is the issue, one of the issues right now, isn't it? That women are working, doing the same job that the male is doing, satisfying the company just as a male is but getting two different salaries. That's not right, that's not justice. I have seen with my own eyes in travel and I've seen it so often, it makes me think that it's a common thing that happens in the international community of Muslims or I would say overseas. Men treating women like they're their children. The wife. Treating the wife like the wife is his child or his slave. No joke. No joke. I'm very serious. I was with a brother. I used to think I was pretty good. I was with a brother and he was enough to make me feel that we could handle it. I have a little back problem now and if I meet with, get entangled with a tough guy, he might get the advantage of me. So, I had a pretty tough brother with me. I told him, I said, look at that. Look what he's doing. I said we should stop him. And then I thought, I said, we in a foreign country. They'll lock us up.
I changed my mind, but what I did, I let the man know that I saw him and I gave him a stare. Believe me, I could set paper afire sometimes with my stare. And he got very nervous. He started trying to behave differently. He was treating her just like a pack animal. He had a little light thing in his hand. He had her pulling suitcases looked like to me altogether they might've been two or 300 pounds. She struggled with one, went back and got another, struggling bringing the luggage out of the hotel, out of the room, pardon me, and carrying it onto, I guess to the elevator. That's probably where they were going. And that's one example of one thing that I've seen. I saw an old man take a stick and raise it up a cane and he was so old and weak it looked like he had 40 wives demanding his strength. He raised his cane up and I'm looking at it from a distance though I was a good ways away. I was in the open plane. You can see a long way. He raised his cane up and came right down on her head like that.
And she fell. And I could hear her scream from the distance. And in a little time thank Allah, the police was there. And the police checked him. But he began to talk to the police and I could see the police favoring him over the woman. Police was listening mainly to what he was saying. So, the police just pushed him a little bit and let him go.
Leadership in the Islamic world, if it's going to be respected as Islamic leadership by me, and I'm sure by many of you, it has to correct situations like that, ignorance like that, that's existing in those nations or in those countries, they have to correct it. Until they correct it, I can't respect them as being any Muslims that we should look to and admire or even feel comfortable with. We can't feel comfortable with them as long as they're allowing abuses of females like that. If they allow the abuse of females like that, they will allow the abuse of other weak members in the society.
That's not all I would like to say in addressing the international community, but I'm going to close that particular area out by saying this. In spite of the ignorance of Qur'an and our Prophets life, Prayers and Peace be on him, that exists in the leadership and also in the general membership of nations or Islamic societies, we do appreciate a revival of interest in an independent review of the Qur'an and the life of the Prophet. That's growing everywhere. Everywhere. In Sudan and everywhere. There is a new interest in researching again and rethinking again to see how we ourselves made mistakes in our own perceptions, in our own understanding of what is Islam, what Allah has revealed and what the Prophet has demonstrated for us. So, we appreciate that. And with that general interest in going back to check our own self to see if our fathers went wrong and we have proof that the need to do justice by females, by women is a growing concern in the international Ummah. It is a growing concern. Let's come now to our community. I said in the beginning, I hope I'm not taking up too much time. I said, I know you have a schedule and I don't want to disrespect that.
In the beginning I said that what makes our situation more serious than what the international community of Muslims have, the nations outside of America has, have, pardon me, is that we are new converts and most of our people look to our Imams, our writers in the newspaper and others for understanding of Islam. And we are too busy trying to take care of our family and take care of the house or whatever, keep a job and be ready for the job the next day and rest up on the weekend. We are just too busy to become students and studied or learned, I mean learned the people in Islam. So, the responsibility is on those who devote themselves to that study full-time or at least give special attention to that study. So, the responsibility is on our Imams, the responsibility is on our Islamic teachers, the school teachers. The responsibility is on our members of our community that write in the paper on Islam. The responsibility is on these. And if any of you all find any of us, including myself, not respecting what Allah has revealed and what the Prophet Muhammad has demonstrated, you should call us to account.
And if you can't call us to account, you should reject us. But don't do it without knowledge. Now I've been called everything and some of it's true, but I have relationship with only one woman. I have relationship with only one woman. I've had to marry several times. I've newly married to Sister Bina Muhammad and she's with me now. She's somewhere in the hotel here. She's here with me. I don't like any confusion.
Sister In Audience:
Thank you. Thank you brother.
IWDM:
But you know we all human, we are not G-d. Or Goddesses. We are human. So, we have to tolerate each other and be patient with each other and bear until the very end. But I ain't going to let nobody put me and them in hell together. Now I may let one or the other of us slip down in the hell if I can't help it, but I'm definitely not going to walk down into the pit with another person. No indeed. So there's a limit. And I love every woman that I have married. I love them. I wouldn't marry a woman until I love her first. I love them. And because of the means that Allah has made available to me, I do not have any woman that I ever married on the streets, on welfare, or begging anybody. Most of my income, and it is a big income because I don't only get a good income from the ministry, I also make lectures. I do other things, publications, I get income from those things. Most of my income goes to take care of my family. And I consider my family my children by each one of the wives that I have been married to and the one that I have married, she has four children. My obligation is to help her with her children.
In fact, they're no longer her children, they're our children. And most of them, they're up where they can't do anything but just excite the life in me looking at them. So, they not going to do anything but prolong my life. So, they don't demand that much from me at all. In fact, she doesn't demand that much from me at all. She has her own home. I didn't have to buy her home. She has a home. And she lost her husband. Her husband was killed. I know her husband, good brother. He was killed, robbed, killed. So I was miserable and I saw peace. So, we have to respect the rule of justice, the rule of justice. And Islam is peace, isn't it?
Sister in Audience:
Yes.
IWDM:
So, I hear this talk, yes, I would have four wives if I could manage it. I can't manage it. I tried. I would. If I could manage it, I would have them all. And they're not quite four, they're three. I certainly would have those three. I would have them all together if I could manage it, but I can't manage it and I don't think they can manage it. So, I don't have it. But some of these brothers, they tell me they're managing very well. Congratulations. But remember the rule of justice brothers.
And Allah Most Glorified says, if you cannot be fair by more than one, then marry only one. Or those in whom your right hand possess. Now it says right hand. Right hand itself implies that the reason, the justification for you having those is justice. What is the justice? There was war, many widows, many orphans, and there was no such thing as orphanage to take care of them. Society hadn't evolved those institutions like an orphanage. And orphanage really right now is not acceptable to Muslims. We would tolerate that, but that's not acceptable to Muslims. Orphanage home for the elderly. Not acceptable. Until we can do better, we try to get it and try to run it as best we can if we can. But it's not acceptable. We are not supposed to throw our members of our family into some facility for others to manage and we go there and see them once a week. We are supposed to find family member with the means and that family member with the means is obligated by Islam to take care of that relative. And have family come over and see that relative. And the family share responsibility for that relative. That's the way it's supposed to be. I don't have the time and so many things we should say that need to be corrected and understood. But InshaAllah soon I'll be writing the Sharia for America and we'll deal with all these issues.
We'll deal with all of these problems and issues, InshaAllah. Now the brothers should understand that the first reason should be for taking on more than one wife is that you are going to help relieve society of a burden that's on society. Here is a woman that is widowed. She doesn't have a man to help her or to be her company and her protection anymore. She doesn't have a father for her children anymore. So, you take her as a wife to give a home of better existence to her children first, but also to her. Allah obligates us to take care of the widows, to take care of the orphan. And He says, if you can't be just by the orphans, meaning if you can't treat her child like you treat your own child, then you keep only one wife, then marry only one. If you can't be just by the orphans, then marry only one. Now we know that that's not the only, I would say basis for a plurality of wives, more than one wife. Another reason for having more than one wife is that you are married to one wife and now she can no longer take care of the needs.
And you are taxed, you don't have time, you are not free to give her the kind of help she needs or to take it over yourself. Take over that role, responsibility yourself. So, you married with her permission if you possibly can get it. But sisters, I have to correct you. He does not have to get your permission if he is obeying what Allah has ordered. If he meets the qualifications that Allah has given, he does not have to have your permission. And in that case then you have to either accept what he has imposed upon you because of his circumstances or situation or you have to ask for divorce and you can divorce him. No sister is to be forced into a polygamous arrangement. There is no compulsion in this religion and certainly no domination. We cannot dominate or impose and force our will on each other. That's against Islam. This is a religion of peace, not the religion of forcer domination, yes. So, he does have other justifications other than just taking care of orphans. He has other justifications. Say he married you and you were a help to him in his business, and now you can't help him in his business anymore.
He meets another sister and he should be looking for another sister that he can help or marry that will relieve society. He shouldn't just be looking at an attractive sister.
He shouldn't just be looking for a pretty woman or a shapely woman or a younger woman. No, that would cancel out his right to have more than another wife because Allah says, "And do not marry out of lust." And lust mean desiring her physically. Thats no reason to marry a woman. I want her physically. There's no reason to marry. That's reason for animals to come together. That's no reason to marry a woman, because she attracts me physically. Oh, she's attractive. Oh, she's pretty. Oh, I like the curves. Oh, I like that slinky, that slinky, sleek. That slinky thing. No, no, that's no reason. That kills my quality. That kills all the quality in me that is Islamic or decent for a human being. That kills it. But if she has the other things I'm looking for and have that too, I look at that after I look at the other thing. And then I say "Thank you, G-d, this is going to be easier than I thought."
But if we mature brothers, if we mature as Muslims, as Muslims, if we mature in Islamic thinking with knowledge of Qur'an regarding this particular matter, if we mature, we look at a sister that we used to not even pay attention to and that sister becomes so beautiful and attractive to us. Why? Because we don't look for the same things anymore. We look for peace. G-d says He has made us that we should have what? Peace with each other. Tranquility. Tranquility. That we should find in mating each other, that tranquility of the soul. My soul is at rest and peace with you. Your soul is at rest and peace with me. I love to sleep with you. I rest so well beside you. That's what makes real marriage. But if you just got some meat over there, you're looking at, that's not the quality relationship that Allah wants for us, that's the animal relationship. And brothers should never be drawn into a relationship because of that kind of attraction. He should be drawn in a relationship first of all because he feels that he will be a better Muslim, that it will not hurt his Islam and his Muslim life, but give better situation for that life by joining that sister. If he think that joining that sister is going to give a worse situation for his Islamic life, then he should hold back even though the sister have a lot of things to offer him. And Allah also says, not directly but through the Muhammad as an example for us, that anyone, the Prophet says, any brother who turns down a good faithful believing Muslim woman, what he will get behind that will be hell. So this is what our brothers should understand. Even when we divorce women. Allah says, "And don't just divorce them but separate from them with kindness and with a generous offer." With a generous offer. Offer them something to help them in their life after you.
This is the Islamic way. This is the Muslim way. The Prophet as we know, Prayers and Peace be upon him, he was allowed a certain number of wives, some say 12, some say nine. Nine wives. When it reached a certain number Allah said, "And you are not permitted to marry any woman after this." That's in the Qur'an. Allah put a stop on the number of wives that the Prophet could have. Now understand that the Prophet was a new teacher, a new leader and teacher for a society of men that had been privileged to have any number of women they wanted to have. And had no law to protect those women.
And they divorced them at will without having to go to any court or have any law over them. Understand that. And brothers, if we understand that, then we should understand also that if the Prophet was limited at that time and Allah ordered that men of means be limited and be given very strict rules to follow in order to qualify for more than one wife, that should tell us, given that time and the conditions and what the society was used to, that we shouldn't be so quick to disrupt the peace and order of the American society by taking on more than one woman in a society that tries to take care of the women by taxing all of us, and that includes me, too much. They try to take care of all the women, all with the children, all the women with the children, all the women that are widows, et cetera, that need public aid or help, assistance. We should not be so quick to try to imitate a practice of that time in America given the circumstances and the situation and the thinking and the sensitivities in the people of this society. We should be very cautious and very hesitant to take on another wife. Because this society is not a society that have had many wives or allowed men to have many wives. This is a society that believes a man should have only one wife. So out of respect for the sentiments of the society, we should not want to just take on another wife. We should be compelled to take on another wife because we need that other wife, that second wife so bad or that third wife so badly. And the need is supported or justified in Qur'an and in the Sunnah of the Prophet, in the life of the Prophet, Peace be on him. That should be the attitude of our men. Not to just go and get another woman because I'm unhappy. Allah is my witness, I've never got another woman because I was unhappy. I've never rejected a woman because I was unhappy. I rejected a woman because I was miserable. And I never rejected a woman just because I was miserable. I rejected her because she was also miserable. If I'm just miserable, I can live with that. But you miserable too. No, that's too much. I could never walk away from a happy woman, a woman that's happy with me. So, I hope you haven't done that brothers. I could never walk away from a sister that's happy with me. No, if she's happy with me, I'm going to be happy with her.
And Allah is my witness. She can be 80 years old. She can be from bush land in Africa. I think they call the bush people, little short people with booties that big, and big muscular shoulders. Yeah, yeah. If she was a good Muslim, if was a good Muslim. I know I could be her husband and be at peace with her. I know that. But as I said it sure help to get those fringe benefits. I said this years ago, I'll repeat it. Any brother that is not having the finance, finances, the income, the financial income to keep one wife off of welfare......
Sister in Audience:
Come on with it brother Imam.
IWDM:
And with a decent living has not yet qualified to have one wife. Now if a sister marry him, that's mercy. Or either perversion. Now then a brother go and take on another sister? He hasn't got enough to give justice to the one. And now he takes on another one and further neglect the first, increase his neglect of the first and start favoring the second one? That's unIslamic. Let me tell you something I know about some of these situations. We have brothers that are afraid to go to court. They really want a divorce, but they're afraid to go to court because they're afraid the judge is going to make them do more than they're willing to do. So, they act all holy. They get more holy than ever. "As Salaam Alaikum sister." He used to call you Mary or Rashida or something. He call your sister now. "As Salaam Alaikum sister. Whatever Allah has allowed, we must accept. Allah has allowed that the brothers could have more than one wife." You should start talking just like him. "Wa Alaikum As Salaam weakling. I'm going to start procedures right away and I might turn some of my strong men relatives on you too. Allhamdulilah, Insha Allah." We have a serious problem. If I could have more than one wife, I would. I have not gone and had sex with another woman before separating from her and letting her know I'm not your husband anymore. I can't have this function with you anymore. And I never got involved with another woman until I told the one I was married to I am getting involved with this woman.
Nobody had to tell my wife that I was going to take on another wife. No, she knew. She knew that I was seeing our relationship as finished and I was taking on another wife. Now, if I had the situation where the wife would accept another wife, Allah as my witness, I would've tried my best to keep both and be just by them. I would've tried my best. I feel that's my obligation as a Muslim. I would've tried my best, but the situation wouldn't allow it. She wasn't willing to accept it. So, I couldn't impose it upon her. And not only that, as I said, our relationship had deteriorated so much, there was just no need. Just no need. For her sake and for my sake, it was best that we just ended it. Presently. I'm not separated, ah pardon me, divorced under the law of the land from Shirley Muhammad. Presently I'm not. But we tried everything. We saw advisors, we went to counseling, everything.
And we were not able to bring about a situation that would allow us to live a human life. We have to be human, live a human life, have peace, not torture, not live in torture. So, we were not able to do it. It hurt her. Sometimes she was enraged and she would be so enraged she would say things to me that I'm telling you, they would send me backwards and under and everything else. And sometimes she would upset me and maybe I said some things to her too. But she always come back and she tell me, she'd correct it. Either by saying she was wrong or by telling me the truth about myself. I received a communication from her just recently and the communication said, Wallace, you are a good man. Said, I pray Allah give you peace. That's what she told me in the communication. Said, I pray Allah give you peace. She said, and I still care about you. That's what she told me. Now that was a private note, but I shared it with you. Now I hope you brothers can separate and have your wife that you separated or divorced, send you some notes like that.
You may not, many of you may not be aware of it, but I also married a sister that had some mental problems. She had it since she was young. Excuse me. I knew it before I married her. I knew it when I got interested in her, but I thought that her condition would improve. She had many talents, talented person and the fear of G-d was in her and she had a child. At that time about nine years old. And again, as I said, my life was not normal for a human being. Miserable. And the mate also was miserable.
So, I married the sister. And as she got older and got more children, which we agreed we shouldn't have had any more children, she was not able to bear any more burden like that. I told her she shouldn't do it, but she insisted. As the burden increased on her, her condition got worse and it started affecting the children. I had to do something about that, tried my best to get her to get some help from the hospital. She refused and still refused. I'm still trying to get her to get help though I'm away from her. I still want her to get help. Thank Allah. Two of the children are with me. Only one's with her and she's doing much better now with just one child to be worried with. And Allah chose the child for her to keep. Two said they wanted to go with me. One said they want to stay home with mama.
Sister in Audience:
Allhamdulilah.

IWDM:
The one that said they want to stay home with mama is the best one for her. She's full of life and jokes and fun and she's good for her mother and she's independent. When she was nothing but about four years old, she would climb up, get a chair and get up and reach up to the shelf and get what she want. She get hungry. She ain't going to wait for you to feed her. Feed herself and offer something to go try to feed her youngest brother. So the condition for this wife that I was married to has improved since the two children came with me and the one left with her has improved. But I'm not satisfied with it. No one wants to be separated from the children. I don't like it. I'm not happy with the situation, but knowing that it's better for her, better for the children. It's a better situation. So I'm content to have it like this. In time I hope that she will see that really she doesn't need that responsibility. And she could have the children, see the children when she want, visit them when she want, but she should leave them under my supervision. She goes into a kind of, I'm not giving you any name, who it was. She blanks out. She blanks out. And the children be trying to get her attention. And little children trying to get your attention, and they can't get it. Some of you sisters don't have any emotional problems, no mental problems, but you blank out too and there's a little desperate child trying to get your attention, crying and hollering, desperate to get your attention. You got problems and you'll tell 'em, "I got enough problems. I got enough problems. Leave me alone. Your little nigga you."
Yeah, they'll do that. I've heard it, I've heard it. I've heard parent, mother say that to their own child, little child. "Get away from me your little nappy headed nigga, leave me alone now." She needs help. That mother needs help. So if you like that sister, get some help. Go to the doctor and get some help so you won't continue to be guilty of ruining the life of your child. Didn't want to get off on that. But I've seen these things and if I've seen them then I should say something about it because most likely it's a problem for many of us. If we have seen it in one home, most likely it's in other homes. So that's why when I see these things, I bring 'em to your attention. Be very careful. Don't reject little children that's desperate and crying for your attention. Now you mothers, you're mothers and when a child is putting on faking, just like I know one of my children. Just scream, "Ahhhhh." As soon as that child see it ain't going to get it, it is over. He knows when it's over. Just stop crying. All of a sudden get busy doing something.
Now that's different. So if you know your child's thinking, it's different. But if you know that child desperately calling for your attention, give the child your attention. This is so important that a mother in prayer while she's doing prayer in congregation, if her child starts crying or need her,, she can stop praying. Just stop immediately. Stop praying immediately and tend to your child. And if the situation is so urgent that you don't have time to Salaam out, your prayer is still accepted. You stop immediately. Take care of your child.
The Prophet, Prayers and Peace be upon him. Many of you have heard this story I'm sure, which is true of the Prophet. This is recorded. He was once praying and he was observed by others who were not. He was doing his extra prayers and he was observed by others that he was in sadja so long they thought something had happened to him. But it was a little child. A toddler was on his back and he didn't want to raise up out of sadja for fear that the child may fall. So he just stayed in sadja until the child decided to get off his back. Then he came up out of sadja. See how we need not only the Qur'an but also that one that demonstrated to us how we are to live or follow and live that Qur'an. Muhammad the Prophet, the Prayers and the Peace be on him. Now I hope that I'm leaving a little time for questions but in concluding this, I would like to say this. I was blessed to be a part of the World Parliament of World Religions in Chicago that's celebrating their Centennial. This is their return to Chicago after 100 years. The same Parliament Conference of Religions is taking place in Chicago. In fact, it's not over, it's still going on. It will be going on until the end of the week, until Saturday I believe. I attended there. I'm a trustee, not by my asking, they made me a trustee. One of the trustees. Four Presidents were selected to represent the Muslims in America, the Muslims of the world at this conference, I'm one of those Presidents.
I'm one of the four Presidents and we've been meeting together and discussing different things. And one of the resolutions that were passed or agreements that were made there, and I think they call it declaration, I rather use the term they used, declaration. In the declaration, the women, women, the treatment of women working for just treatment of women is mentioned in there. So here is a Parliament coming together of the religions of the world and many of them represented even witchcraft and something else that was frowned upon and disliked by many of us. They didn't want to start, they didn't want to give these unconventional groups, nonconventional groups, an excuse to disrupt the whole Parliament with a demonstration. So I believe that even if homosexuals had come there and say our religion is a religion of homosexuality, I believe they would've been accepted because they didn't want no disruption, no demonstrations to destroy the peace.
But I think a lot of good has come out of it and will continue to come out until the end of the sessions there in Chicago. It's important to note that when that conference was held in Chicago a hundred years ago, there was only one Muslim in the whole world present. That Muslim was a man named Webster. Webb, pardon me, Daniel Webb, an African-American, a black man. He was the only one there representing Islam in that world body of religions. World convening of religions. This time there are hundreds of Muslims represented. Very notable persons from different Muslim countries like Saudi Arabia and others represented there and a big number of African-American Muslims and myself as a trustee on the Parliament board, the board for the Parliament. And representing, a son of Elijah, one of the Presidents, four Presidents representing Muslims around the world. Don't you know, that is very phenomenal. It must be G-d's working. That's G-d's working. Yes. So we should feel good about these things. And when I see them listing certain issues that they're going to address and that they feel that all the religions should concentrate on, when I see them, the selection that they have made. I see really the vibrations that have been coming from us since 1975 and perhaps even before. One thing we have to remember, that the Honorable Elijah Muhammad himself was not a man to hold a sister back if that sister had qualifications. He had sisters in the top of his leadership, sisters in the top of leadership. One of the most powerful persons in his National leadership was a sister. A sister. I ain't going to name her because since then, I guess she was just good for that back there. I don't want her name her, but she was a powerful little sister, powerful little sister. And the Honorable Elijah Muhammad, as you know, would have sisters give instructions from himself to his top people, men in his organization. This is really the last comment I'm going to make. Sisters, let's understand this because the hypocrites, the pretenders, the enemies of Islam, the infiltrators that come among us pretending to be good Muslims, they will find weaknesses. And when they find those weaknesses, they'll feed those weaknesses to hurt us and keep us away from the Islamic life that Allah intends for us. So let's understand this. That the position of Imam for men only does not in any way discriminate against women. Why do I say this? Because the position of Imam is one who leads in prayer.
Everything else the man does, including leading in prayer, the woman can also do but not for public or congregational prayer and not when a able male, qualified male is present. But she can do it. So if you can do it if he's not around, is that discriminating against you? I don't think so. It's saying that here is a symbol here that we want to preserve for the male in the public's eye. And you sisters would lie to me if you told me that you don't want a man to be out in the public in front of you. When I said you sisters, I mean the great majority. You always have that exception. Now let's see does the Imam have any right to do like this over the sister. You see how beautifully this sister recited Qur'an? She's making a lot of Imams jealous. Not only does she have the right to recite Qur'an to us in public, she has the right to quote Qur'an to us in public and bring the highest man to conform to what Allah has revealed. This is already established in the history of Islam. Women did that, called the attention of the Khalifa. Called his attention to his errors and quoted Qur'an, or quoted the Prophet. Made him conform right in the public eyes.
Not only that, the sister can qualify in the knowledge of Qur'an and in the knowledge of the Prophets Seerah, tradition, his life example, to the point where she excels all the men in our group or in our society. Then she becomes the authority. We will be quoting her. This is Islam. This has already happened. Thank you very much. So we pray G-d forgive us our ignorance and our errors and our sins. Grant us mercy and guidance always. Ameen.
Sister in Audience:
Takbir. Allahu Akbar!
Sis Amatullah:
We sincerely thank Allah for His favors and blessings in having Muslim-American Spokesman for Human Salvation Imam Mohammed with us today and we hope to have him to address us again in the future in sessions like these InShallah.
Sister in Audience:
Yes. Okay.
Sis Amatullah:
We have a few minutes for some questions for the Imam. If you have your questionaires, pass them up please, but we have to keep it brief because we will have to be leaving shortly. We don't want to go over too much. The question here, Brother Imam, is if a sister is put in Idat and that Idat is broken, then put into Idat a second time and that divorce is final, then the sister and brother remarried, does that second marriage begin with two Idats already with only one remaining or is it like starting all over again?
IWDM:
Let me be sure I understand the question now. They have already gone the number of days and then it was broken. They break it, they got back together.
Sis Amatullah:
And then they went into Idat a second time.
IWDM:
Okay. Okay. If they break it the third time, then the brother cannot go back with the sister until she marries another brother and it is separated or divorce from that brother, then he can remarry. So brother, if you think you want to come back, don't do it.
Sis Amatullah:
Okay. How should we begin working with our Muslim girls and daughters and sons with the importance of preserving the institution of marriage and choosing a mate from among the young Muslim males and females of comparable age within our community. How sould we begin working with our Muslim girls and daughters?
IWDM:
Yes. Yes. The Honorable Elijah Muhammad, he knew that slavery and the disruption of our life being brought, put in slavery here, was a serious problem and we needed special attention to that problem. So his teacher Fard gave him the plan for special training classes for women called Muslim Girls Training class. And it was for women and also for the young girls too. Young girls. And I think we still need that. I know we do, but we also have our private schools, our Muslim schools. I think the brothers and sisters who are staffing these schools, they want to see the Islamic social life, family life and social life given to our children at a very early age. They should be brought into the knowledge of how the Muslims should live together as a family, the relationship of parents and children, relationship, husband and wife, the order of the house, what is expected of parents regarding children rights, what is expected of children regarding parents' rights, et cetera.
And preparing for marriage. We should do that. It should be part of our curriculum. The most important relationship, man and woman in sexual bond, social bond, total bond. That's the most important relationship. So how can we ignore including the study of that or the knowledge of that in our curriculum? Even if it's not in a textbook, it should be in the curriculum and it should be guided by some, I would say, clause or principle or in the textbook or in the curriculum that would determine what is to be taught. How far are we to go with such teaching in a classroom to different levels in the elementary school, high school. And after that they should be ready, they should be ready. They shouldn't have to have any more training for that. In fact, when we hear of the age for girls to join the women in Islam and the age for our boys to join the men in Islam, that's telling us that we have a certain point or age for our girls and our boys that we have to include them with us and educate them so when they marry, they're already prepared to do that and have a good life, InshAllah. We have to do that.
So, include it in your curriculum if you can. Work on it. I'm sure some of you are doing that. And also you sisters, qualified sisters, conduct seminars, classes, you can have your own associations. Don't call it MGT class. We don't want to go and open up, what my father used to call, used to call it nest eggs of rattlesnakes or something like that. He called it up in the Pandora's box or a can of worms or whatever. We don't want to go do that. Just let out a lot of confusion that's going to start everybody to wondering what's going on and all that and send us backwards to try to reconcile all this, to try to make sense out of this and make sense out of that. We through with that. We got out of the spider web, thank Allah. Got out of the maze of confusion and we are now in the clear way of Islam.
So, let's not take any language and terminology from the old because it will tend just to draw us back to that kind of thinking and behavior and make people think we're going back. So don't use any language like that. You can just have an association. And you have women associations, you have women associations. So you who desire to do that. I would encourage you to do it. If you have the time and you have the ability and the knowledge and accept the best among you, maybe one will take the initiative and later on you find that there's another sister much more qualified to head that. So don't be selfish. Let the better one, be fair and let the better one head it and you join. Yes, I told him I'm ready for somebody to take over and lead this one. I'll be second, third, fourth, fifth. Come on. Hurry. It's a heavy wood I carry on my back.
Sis Amatullah:
I'm going to try to just take a couple. We have so many questions for the Imam. I think we'll Xerox all these. Send them to you.
IWDM:
That's right, that's right. But if there's anything that you recall in your mind, I'll read it that you want me to speak to, just let me know right now without reading it.
Islamic behavior. Islamic behavior.
What about Islamic behavior?
Sis Amatullah:
We as sisters, we think a lot of things, it's from the brothers a lot, but we have to conform our behavior to Islam to try to balance the situation with them. Not to think everything is their fault. We have to introspectively look into ourselves as to what means we can use as well.
IWDM:
Females are really the first and most appreciated guardians of Islamic behavior. Females. You are the ones supposed to make sure that that behavior is in your children. Do your best to have Islamic behavior in your children and you should be the first to speak out if you see the behavior, of our behavior, the behavior of your community, your brothers, your men or the general community insulting the Islamic behavior, being a disgrace to Islamic behavior. You sisters should be the first to speak out. You should be the first to speak out. You should be the ones that we look to first, to put the demand on us, that we keep the Islamic behavior. But you have to be yourself a good model of Muslim behavior, Islamic behavior.
Sis Amatullah:
That's great.
IWDM:
Alright. Thank you. Asalaam Alaikum
Sis Amatullah:
Takbir. Allahu Akbar!



